Update

Saw the Doctor today, and she says that I have made amazing progress in the last couple of weeks, helped a lot, she thinks, by the fact that my pills have now really started to kick in and do their stuff. I told her that what I really wanted to do was to get back home to Bristol, and that I thought if I went now without the pressure of lectures or any obligation of that sort it might be a way of easing myself back into things. Showing that scary kind of insight that people who've known you for ages seem to have, she agreed that this would be good as I have this tendency to compartmentalise things and to take these sort of logical steps would probably work for me; while I'm there I can also see about looking into going back after Christmas, and meeting up with my Uni mates outside lectures.

Sounds like I'm pretty much fine doesn't it? I hope this lasts, but in order not to throw myself into the deep end too dramatically, I am going to stay with my Nan for a bit, and see my wonderful, life saving family. Partially because I want to see everyone, partly as it will be a nice mid-point between being away from home and being totally on my own. A big reason though is that my Nan has not been at all well, and I want to go and take my turn in looking after her for a change.

Wow, I can't half waffle can't I?

'Scuse me while I just go and hide in a corner somewhere and wish it would all be over, to save having to live everyday trying to convince myself and everyone else around that I'm getting better and feeling more positive. At least I have convinced myself that I can live with it, thanks to everyone who helped drum that into me.