I am giving myself 5 weeks, starting Monday 18th Jan, to sort stuff out, particularly my grades. If nothing improves, I plan to quit Uni and end this chapter of a somewhat unfulfilled and unsatisfactory life.
I really don't want to do this, but it is important to be realistic; I have found that looking back, as pragmatically as possible, over the last two years, and assessing the pros and cons of remaining a student, the negative feelings and outcomes of my time at Uni are outweighing the positive ones. This is particularly true of the last 6 weeks, and I feel that setting out a deadline of 5 weeks is a sensible period of time in which to try and straighten things out before making any sort of decision.
I should point out that this is not one of the negative cycles that I find myself in on a semi-regular basis, and I am in fact being as objective as possible about this. I intend to keep some sort of record of how each day passes so that when it comes to making the decision I will have a decently sized continuous data set to consider, as well as the general view of things up to the start of this period.
The Clock's ticking, I hope very much that things will be better by the end of February.
3 comments:
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SC
You should look at this in terms of what you really want out of your life. Try to put aside any negative thoughts & feelings that are caused through depression or bad experience and instead think of yourself in ten years time looking back over the decade. What would you like to be true about yourself and what you achieved during that time? What type of life have you aimed for and what did you do to get it (or closer to it) that makes you happy with yourself.
It's important to do this because it is easy to let negative experience or thoughts stop you from achieving what you want. I know from experience what it's like to look back and realize I strayed far from what would have made me happy because I let depression and the normal challenges of life convince me it would be better and easier to just close the book and hide away. Of course it's not easier and it can waste a lot of time, you only have one life after all.
I urge you to identify what your life goals are and then determine your next steps based on that. I have found some of the material at http://zenhabits.net valuable, it may be worth a look.
Btw I'm not saying you should stay at uni or leave, the range of options you have may be wider than this.
Sorry this comment was long, I didn't have time to write concisely.
@ Anonymous (the 2nd if you're two different Anons);
Thank you for the words of advice, thinking about where I want my life to go etc. is precisely one of the reasons that I am giving myself this 5 week deadline.
I had always thought that this was exactly what I wanted to do - in fact, I really can't imagine myself doing anything else, but there comes a point where you have to decide if something you want is necessarily something you can have, and whether the stress levels that you are facing in the present are worth what is not always a certainty for the future.
I know they say 'no pain no gain', and that if you want something enough it's worth fighting for, but sometimes people fight for the wrong things when really they're not sure what they want.
This was a very long reply, but I did feel that I had to acknowledge the help that you are offering and assure you that I am really very grateful and will be taking any advice I'm given over the next few weeks into consideration when I'm making my decision.
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