Thought Saturation

I have been trying a lot of things lately to try not to think about my impending exam results. Today I was editing and finishing off an essay that I started a while ago. This particular piece was tricky to finish for reasons which will become clear if you read it as the subject matter is somewhat self-explanatory.

As always with my writing, it was a difficult decision upon completion as to whether to publish or burn the piece. Two times out of three I will opt for burning (or in some way seeking to destroy), but this time I thought it might be interesting to publish and gauge opinions.

So, if you fancy taking a look, please click the following link: THIS IS THE LINK.

If you do decide to read it, please let me know what you think. This is still a relatively early draft, but without having an English teacher anymore, it's hard for me to look at it objectively to see where to improve.

Deadline

I am giving myself 5 weeks, starting Monday 18th Jan, to sort stuff out, particularly my grades. If nothing improves, I plan to quit Uni and end this chapter of a somewhat unfulfilled and unsatisfactory life.

I really don't want to do this, but it is important to be realistic; I have found that looking back, as pragmatically as possible, over the last two years, and assessing the pros and cons of remaining a student, the negative feelings and outcomes of my time at Uni are outweighing the positive ones. This is particularly true of the last 6 weeks, and I feel that setting out a deadline of 5 weeks is a sensible period of time in which to try and straighten things out before making any sort of decision.

I should point out that this is not one of the negative cycles that I find myself in on a semi-regular basis, and I am in fact being as objective as possible about this. I intend to keep some sort of record of how each day passes so that when it comes to making the decision I will have a decently sized continuous data set to consider, as well as the general view of things up to the start of this period.

The Clock's ticking, I hope very much that things will be better by the end of February.